Warming Up

So I wasn’t even attempting to do Dry January, but I have been trying to lose weight and stopping drinking seemed an easy way to help that along and I haven’t missed booze for a second yet (until last night when I dreamt that I had two large gin and tonics for breakfast, remembered I wasn’t meant to be drinking and resolved to keep my alcoholism from my wife and pretend I was still strong - at least I think it was a dream). I also gave up chocolate, did more exercise and counted calories and stayed within my allowed limit on all but about 3 days. 

I have lost 5.4kgs (or 12 pounds) so far. I am still about 3 kgs heavier than when I moved to this house. So there’s still some way to go.

As always the real secret to rapid weight loss is to eat way too much for several years and then eat a normal amount. You’re welcome.

The Terry Hall RHLSTP has been received very well and I am especially delighted that so many of his fans seemed to enjoy it, as I was conscious that I didn’t want to let them down. The story about Terry being sexually abused as a child has made the national newspapers, which I have mixed feelings about, but I did enjoy this unexpected bit of humour from the BBC website. They linked to my tweet about how much love the podcast was getting, but they printed the tweet in full. I’d said, 

"Getting lots of love for latest RHLSTP with the genius that is Terry Hall - Now up on audio (video being reloaded cos Chris Evans - not that one- uploaded low res version, the clot. This wouldn’t happen with Cpt America)”

So Chris Evans (not that one, though maybe the BBC think it is that one) incompetence at uploading podcasts is now officially national news. Plus it’s been confirmed that he is a â€œclod”. Nothing could make me happier.

I’d had a long day starting with a puking baby, as I prepared for the journey up to Wolverhampton to appear at Bilston Town Hall, talking to Sathnam Sanghera. We are going to try and film most of the on the road podcasts (and there’s quite a few more to inform you about - news soon), but just to start us off it was just me and producer Ben driving through the snow to get to the fifth worst city on the planet according to the Lonely Planet (though as I pointed out to the audience that’s only on THIS planet.If it was every planet then Wolverhampton might not even make the top 10).

I love Wolverhampton though, even if they have historically been less keen on me. My ambition is to play the big room at the Civic, but as my audience here averages around 140, that seems unlikely. Tonight though about 250 excited Wolverhampton residents (and I would argue I had everyone from the city who voted Remain in the room) crammed into this weird town hall to see me (or possibly Sathnam, who knows).

They took my jibes well though and were a lively and fun audience, chipping in with lots of comments and information about the sewage works. It was a mildly sprawling chat, but in a good way and I didn’t get to talk about a lot of the things that I’d prepared, going off at tangents about Bros and the previous time I had met Sathnam (which I did not recall) and the disgraceful way I’d behaved. 

This review in the Express and Star gives a good taster of what to expect. The pod will be out in audio only on 13th Feb.

And do book ahead for upcoming tour gigs. There are only balcony seats left at the Komedia in Bath on 15th Feb and the extra show in Brighton on 3rd April is selling well too. 

It almost feels like I am a success. Don’t know how to react.

Why did I waste my time crafting intricate stand up shows when the public just want me to come to their town and insult them and their local celebrities? 

Still tickets for the stellar line up of Jon Ronson and Emily Atack on Monday 4th at the Leicester Square Theatre. Use it or lose it cock knees