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Thursday 26th December 2013


Marriage brings many benefits, but the main one is that you can (if you so desire) get two Christmases. Today we drove from Somerset to Hertfordshire to have more booze, food and presents with the in-laws. And we were reunited with our cats who've been staying here for the last few days and have settled in with minimal fuss. If anything they seem happier living here than they do living with us. I think they were disappointed to see us - "oh no, we're not going to be living with them again are we?" After all we did for them. It was fun seeing them interact with the in-laws' cat. Maurice, though. Smithers tried to make friends and pressed his nose against the bigger, older cat's nose, like they were kissing, but Liono remained as aloof as always. When Maurice tried to get out into the conservatory to eat their food though, friendship fell by the wayside and there was a bit of a stand-off and sand some hissing. Smithers may be a friendly cat, but no one eats his Christmas dinner.

I decided to make today my last day of scoffing and boozing, but did plenty of both of those, tucking into a Gin and Tonic as soon as I arrived and having champagne, wine and port over the next few hours. Luckily I like my in-laws and don't have to be drunk to spend a day with them, but being drunk with them is fun too!

We watched the Muppet Christmas Carol as we seem to do every year (the extended VHS version - we were disgusted with ourselves for not having had the politeness to rewind it after watching it last year). I love the story of Scrooge and will happily watch most adaptations many times over (not the Jim Carey one though, that is shithouse) and saw Scrooged again before Christmas. But for the first time this year I have felt a bit uncomfortable about the phoniness of all the adaptations. They all claim that Christmas is a time for sharing, love, family and looking out for the poor, but I suspect that Bill Murray, Michael Caine, Jim Carey, Albert Finney and Gonzo all took their paycheque for their work and then went off and spent it on themselves. I suspect that even Charles Dickens spent most of his royalties on top hats and loose actresses. I decided that it should become a law that from now on any money made from adaptations of a Christmas Carol (and I am including Scrooge McDuck in this) should be given to the needy. Otherwise it is just actors and Muppets preaching one thing and then acting in another. It's a big trick to make us think that love is more important than money, being perpetrated by people who actually believe that money is best. And the fact they are right does not forgive them their hypocrisy. I would go as far as saying that any actor who plays Scrooge should devote the rest of his life to good deeds and never accept any money for anything. Otherwise they are just tricking us into believing a lie.

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