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Friday 11th June 2021

6768/19688
Had a very good personal training session. My strength is much improved as is my stamina and my trainer seemed impressed with my progress. I sweated a lot. I've noticed in the last few months that my sweat has started smelling really bad, even to me. Much funkier and earthier. What’s up with that? I naturally expect everyone else to be appalled by my bodily smells, but I used to not mind my own. Why am I smelling so weird? Is this just old age?

Tonight, as the kids' bedtime approached, Phoebe and Ernie were playing for time, trying to extend their waking hours as long as possible. Ernie asked Siri to play "London Bridge is Falling Down" and Siri, ever the contrarian played the Kirsty MacColl song of that name, because, of course, that's what a 3 year old wants, Siri, you fucking prick.
Anyway the kids kept messing around and I said, "Right, come on, we should go to bed now." I don't know what other stuff got said or what Siri thought it had heard, but I looked down at my Apple Watch which I saw had composed a message, which it had for whatever reason decided to send to the widow of a friend of mine saying, "We should go to bed now."
Luckily Siri had the decency to wait for a confirm from me that I wanted to send that message, but my heart jumped so high when I saw it that I fumbled towards the screen to delete it as quickly as possible in such a way that I might easily have sent it rather than deleted it.
I deleted it.
Though I had to check twice that I definitely had as I thought about the terrible consequences if that had been delivered. Eighteen months had gone by since her husband's passing, so the addition of "now" really made it feel like I thought I'd left a respectable pause to allow her to grieve, before leaping straight to the point. I would hope that if I had made that plan and set myself a calendar note to get in touch in the future I might have started with "Hi, how are you doing?" before trying to help her move on.
If that text had sent then who knows the terrible consequences? Siri could have pulled my family apart. Though it might possibly have set me up with a new family. I'm still scrunching up my face with embarrassment even though it didn't even happen. No one would believe that it was just an accident. You don't even believe it reading this now. You think I am trying to make a lame excuse after being discovered with this message on my phone.
But not a bad idea for a film or something. A man having his life ripped apart by the incompetence of his phone/watch assistant. Or getting a positive reply and deciding to go for it. The 21st Century is an incredible and terrible place to live. Imagine trying to explain this to someone from even 15 years ago.



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