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The general feeling is that the dog comes first. Sorry stupid children. Enjoy your self-created injuries. I'll see to you in a minute.
I was counting up the future profits today as Phoebe has invented a cool new game called "Truth or Dare Jenga". She's coloured one side of the blocks (which will be hidden when it's in the tower) and then the colour corresponds to a truth or dare card that you have to play if the block you remove is the colour (or you can choose if both colours are on there). Absolute genius. Given Traitors is just an adaptation of a parlour game that a lot of people have played then surely this is acceptable idea theft, as long as we don't call it Jenga and never write a blog proving that that was the source.
I am annoyed that I didn't come up with Traitors. It struck me years ago that there was formats to be had in the publicly owned games we used to play as kids, but I never thought of doing this one for some reason. I tried to think about something based on that one where you pick a book and everyone has to write what they imagine the first line is and then they're read out with the actual first line. I think someone else did this one too. Or maybe I should get on with it.
I was all ready to be Phoebe's 90% fee manager and to get this Tower of Truth or Dare Game (take that Ian Jenga) off the ground. I asked her if she'd really come up with it herself and she didn't seem sure, so I googled it.
Jenga has a Truth or Dare version.
It's not as good as Phoebe's.
The good news is that I can nick a lot of her Truths for Emergency Questions, so I can exploit my kids after all. Give them 50p and they think they've won. Idiots.
Later on a dog walk where Wolfie didn't come close to dying (If only Joey from Bread had thought of writing "Sliding Dogs") Ernie was blathering on and I was getting frustrated with Wolfie stopping to sniff and/or eat everything she saw. Ernie pointed out that dogs like to smell each other's wee, which is always worth saying. He said it was how they communicated and was "the dog version of social media."
What a phenomenal line.
Certainly for an 8 year old.
It was a bit of a step up from "Why do squirrels swim on their backs? To keep their nuts dry."
Too good for him to have come up with surely? He must have heard it somewhere. Was this child a genius or an ideas thief like his sister?
I wasn't able to give him the credit. He must have heard it somewhere else surely. Even so though, it's a sophisticated joke for an 8 year old to even understand and repeat, so he could be a comedy genius either way.
Creativity starts with recognising something you like and copying it - I am not sure I ever really got beyond that stage - and both these kids have great imaginations and ideas and muses (and a very funny dad who they respect so much that they never try to rip off his material and like instead to pretend to find it pathetic) and have not yet had their joy crushed by rejection and jealousy.
I am very nearly ready to pass the baton on to the next generation. I may not really have amounted to much, but I can now live my life vicariously through them. I won't be jealous when they surpass me. And I won't listen to them when they try to take me to court for stealing all the money and ideas that were rightfully theirs.
Ernie wrote this whole blog in return for a Squares bar, but I'll never admit it.
