Warming Up

8292/21211

That's it guys. My last show done. The Edinburgh Fringe 2025 is officially over. You can all go home.

It was an easy last show for me, with the loquacious Nish Kumar making a rapid return to the show and having plenty to say about everything. He is an extraordinary talent, having already formulated a great rant about Liam Gallageher and his remarks about the Fringe (I did one first, but his felt both crafted and made up on the spur of the moment at the same time).

If you missed the story, it's here. And if you think it's rich that Liam Gallagher is criticising people for making huge amounts of money from his gigs.

He claimed he was bringing two billion pounds into the city (I did that just by renting a flat for two weeks) and summed up the Fringe thusly:

"What’s happening in Edinburgh then? What’s all that thick shit? 'People juggling fucking bollocks and that? Swallowing swords... one-legged bicycles. What’s all that shit about? Shitty card tricks?’

I am not sure he's been to the Fringe, but even though it would be triggering for me I'd love to watch someone juggling bollocks and a one-legged bicycle (with a leg instead of a wheel) sounds amazing.

Admittedly Edinburgh councils assessment of Oasis fans is pretty off-the-scale too. They'll take up more space in bars and be drunk and cause mischief. They looked too old and knackered to do anything too destructive.

Phoebe has never heard of Oasis and dismissed it as "olden people music" which is the best dismissive review I've ever seen of anything.

Anyway, a boiling hot sold-out room and a show that had everything (apart from much of me) and then the run was over.

It has been a success and I've sold enough tickets to ensure that we don't go broke. I was selling Emergency Questions books afterwards in the hope of making a dent in the accommodation costs. I worked out that every book I sold at the Fringe would pay for 23 minutes of my accommodation. We sold enough copies to pay for about four days (of 14), which is impressive. Thanks to everyone who bought one. You can buy it here if you want a laugh/help pay for another 23 mins.

Catie has also had a great Fringe and got the audience dancing with her for the end of her last show. And then we headed to a nice restaurant for a celebratory meal.

I don't know it the waitress recognised one of us (and this Edinburgh it could have been either of the kids - the reviews for Ernie's Chortle Fast Fringe performance are still coming in) or just overheard us talking about our Fringe being over, but as we paid she said that the first round of drinks was on us because doing the Fringe must be hard. We got something back (the equivalent of almost an hour in our flat, which is how I am measuring the cost of everything now. It was a lovely treat at the end of a very enjoyable jaunt for us all. It summed everything up.

Then on the 10 minute walk home my stomach lurched and I really needed the toilet and thought I might shit myself. We made it home just in time. Phoebe commented that it was like the Olaf Falafel joke about the relief you get when you make it to the toilet in time. Actually that summed everything up better.