Bookmark and Share

Sunday 12th December 2021

6950/19470

Wow, Formula One is fucking stupid. I basically only watched the last twenty minutes of the whole season, but it turns out the last lap was all that mattered anyway, so I made the right choice. I was hoping the Safety Car might take it, but it dropped out just short of victory. I think all sports should agree that if one team is way ahead and definitely going to win, they should keep it exciting by restarting things from level right at the last minute (preferably when whoever is winning has knackered themselves getting way ahead to give the worse side a better chance) and then see who wins. Will keep people in the arena buying chips and stuff and they won’t drift off because things look hopeless.

No wonder they call it Formula One. Only one formula required.
I hope the Dutch guy will pay that guy who crashed into a wall for seemingly no good reason, a lot of money.

A robin landed on our front door wreath this morning, allowing a charming Ring video and also some nice cloaca shots for anyone who likes those. Anyway Christmas is here.

We got to see Santa again today. Some friends are recovering from Covid and were unable to use their tickets to Audley End Railway and we decided to snap them up. Covid isn't all bad. For us. Obviously sucks for the other family.

It was a bit further away from our home than we’d anticipated, but none of our tyres burst so that was something. The kids have accepted that the Santa they see at these things might not be the real Santa (though he might be) but still accept that there is a real Santa.
On the way we played “Trickster of Tricks” in which I sing a song claiming to be a brilliant and untrickable trickster. I then immediately attempt an audacious lie which my kids refuse to believe. And then they do one that I fall for. I still then sing the song about me being an untrickable trickster. I said that fairies were pooing on top of the car and my daughter pointed out that she would be able to hear them, but also said there were no fairies, except the tooth fairy who would not be out in the day. It’s a complex world of fantasy for kids as they start to discount some stuff, but still hold on to others. But I suppose it’s good that reality hits in gradual stages. I suspect that this might be my daughter’s last Christmas fully believing in Santa (and even now I’m pretty sure she suspects something is up).
It was a fun morning, with enthusiastic staff playing elves (or were they real elves?) and fairies and a stop on the train to see Santa again, looking suspiciously different than the last one. My daughter almost fell for my trickster trick that the train was taking us to the actual North Pole. The key is not to sing the song just before the trick.



Bookmark and Share



Buy my new book/ebook/audiobook "Would You Rather?" (get stickers and a signed bookplate from gfs. Also available as a very different audiobook with the brilliant Stevie Martin
Help us make more podcasts by becoming a badger You get loads of extras if you do.