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Monday 13th December 2021


For once I was a genius husband, eliciting rare respect from my wife, when I advised that we should head straight to the vaccination place after school drop off so she could get her booster. It was a gamble - surely everyone would be rushing there today after our highly respected PM had said we need to get our arses in gear and also maybe they wouldn’t be accepting walk-ins. But we were early enough to be turned away to begin with, but Catie returned 15 minutes before the doors opened to those who hadn’t booked and got seen almost straight away.
It’s pretty obvious that the country is going to be paralysed by Covid in January - I am not sure there will be another lock down, but I think things are likely to get pretty tough again. Hopefully people will take sensible precautions and the government will be good to their word, but testing kits are already out of stock and there’s been a U turn on what the PM was promising last night and also all experience says that a significant amount of people are going to forgo masks and vasks (my new cool word for vaccinations) and so barring a miracle there’s a big backwards step coming up.
Let’s go round the merry go round one more time. Try not to stand up on as there are knives in the ceiling. Hope to see you all on the other side.
On the plus side - more self playing snooker.

I was feeling well for the first time in weeks today and while my wife got pricked by a stranger I went to the gym and my body and mind felt very sharp afterwards. I wasted the  momentum by going home and playing on my phone in the bath, but my editor is pleased with the couple of chapters I’ve sent her so far. And I am very much looking forward to getting my teeth into the meat of this book (as long as the meat isn’t my testicle, which I suppose it is).

We set up our home filming system within days (really only hours) of the first lockdown and maybe by chance, we’ve just upgraded things in time for whatever lockdown we’ll be on next (5?) and there’s some great new stuff coming up for anyone watching the snooker tomorrow. Chris Evans (not that one) and his friend Gerald came over this afternoon to set things up. There were a few bugs to knock out of the system, but if you weren’t satisfied that you were seeing enough of my wrinkles and grey hair, then you’re going to be very pleased with our new main camera.  If we do go back into lockdown then once again I think we will be ahead of the BBC in broadcast quality. Only Limmy can match us. That’s how far we’ve gone. But a couple of other surprises in store.

The kids were excited about there being unseen men in the attic and at bedtime they both went up to see them. My daughter was keen to let them know that she was the voice behind Fluffy Rabbit from Twitch of Fun and she also wanted to film some more stuff together. She has the performing bug, I think with a mixture of pride and sadness. We’d seen her do her nativity play in which she played the innkeeper (the role I played in my first nativity back in Cobden junior school, Loughbough in 75). We’d watched online last year, but it was hard to believe it was two years since she’d given us her stable boy. The leap forward in performance ability for the whole class was pretty remarkable. The group singing - jaunty upbeat songs rather than the dour carols we sang in my second nativity in Cheddar Primary in 76 (I was the "Frankincense to offer have I” king that time (Phil Pennington was the star of the show singing the little drummer boy song rather beautifully - I don’t need to tell you that, we all remember it). There was a song which had a line along the lines of “I don’t remember all the kings names, but one of them was called Balthazar” which I thought was pretty funny. Phoebe waved at us and acted into  camera when she saw me filming and later told me that she’d wanted to high five us on a bit where she walked through the audience, but wasn’t sure that would be allowed. She therefore does not yet have the confidence of a young Peter Kay upstaging everyone as the cowardly lion, but I think we’re not far off. 
Best bit was when Mary banged Jesus’ head against the manger. I hope it was scripted. I guffawed much too loudly.

Due to the high bidder not paying up or responding to any messages (hey, I don’t mind if you got over excited and regret the purchase - you can withdraw bids on eBay - but at least have the politeness to message and apologise if that happens. I’m not going to give you a shitty review either way) the snooker membership card #2 is up for grabs again. Bid here. It went for £51 last time, though of course, it didn't in the end. Let's get it higher this time to spite the false bidder idiot.
I just want it to go to someone who wants it. All money goes towards future podcasts and our new equipment.

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