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FORTHCOMING EVENTS
NEW DOWNLOADS/PRESS: 07/02/10 PRESS Some more reviews

04/02/10 PRESS Times Review of Hitler Moustache
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HOW NOT TO GROW UP: My new book, "How Not To Grow Up" will be published by Ebury in June 2010. Pre-order your copy at the Waterstones website and if you use the code DK4253 you will only pay £7.99 and be entered into a draw to win my skateboard.
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Click GIGS above for more details or you could have a look on Chortle
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14th Warwick Arts Centre (SOLD OUT)
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Photo by Steve Brown

Skin Selector



Warming Up
Sunday 25th July 2004

CNPS numbers spotted 1 (999).

It's over.

Thank the gods.

I never have to look at another number plate again. And I shan't. Even if I see a crime being committed and they're using a car for their getaway and I am the only witness, I will not look at the number plate.

The car was the one I had tried to see yesterday, but which had been inconsideratly driven somewhere else. Today it was there. I took a photo of it and then took a photo of me kneeling beside it (thank god no-one saw me and asked me what the Hell I was doing). See Downloads section for the photos.

I guess I'd had a day to get used to the fact that I was about to finish, so this wasn't a particularly momentous moment. Like most of the amazing things I've done this year to actually finish it was a slighty anti-climax. But it felt good that it had finished.

And actually the rest of the day was glorious. It was worth going through this Hell for 20 months in order to be able to experience what it was like not to have to do it any more. It was as if a loud background noise that had been droning on for a year and a half had suddenly ceased. Yet one can only truly appreciate the silence when one has had to endure the pandemonium.

So maybe it's been worth it. Maybe this is the divine revelation that I had hoped for.

Occasionally during the rest of the day, by habit, my eyes would stray to the road and I would remind myself I didn't have to do this any more. It was a good feeling to let the cars pass. I am sure it will be some time before I forget entirely.

On the way to the gig in Jackson's Lane I passed a 1 and a 2 in close proximity. I wondered about starting again. I decided not to.

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For details of the Hitler Moustache tour click here and you can book tickets here for The Lyric Comedy Nights


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