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Saturday 22nd March 2014
Saturday 22nd March 2014
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Saturday 22nd March 2014

4136/17055

So fair and foul a day I have not seen. I was running along the Thames this morning and experienced all four seasons in ten minutes. As I passed Hammersmith Bridge I was basking in warm spring sunshine and worrying that I might dehydrate, but less than half a mile later, dark clouds had descended and a strong cold wind almost had me running on the spot, then came heavy drops of rain, followed by somewhat improbable hail. And then once I'd turned for home the sun was burning down on me again. I don't think the run took THAT long. I know I live in the UK and should be used to such weather, but being hailed on seemed to be taking the piss to be honest. It's the end of days folks, look busy.

And fittingly we were going to Hull and back today, Giles and I having agreed that it made sense to drive home after the gig, to save on hotel money and also because a drive from Hull to Cardiff in the daytime is probably trickier than driving back to London and then going to Wales from there. It was worth the trip though. Over 300 people were in the lovely Hull Truck theatre and I think we all had a good time. This is the nicest modern theatre I have played in, with a decent sized auditorium and dressing rooms that are actually pleasant! There were two bathrooms in mine, one of them was labelled "Dis Shower". I went in there and it told me I was fat and unfunny. No, not really, but Di came in and told me she was furious I was using her shower and I said I hoped she'd learned a valuable lesson about possessive apostrophes. Not really, but in the end I decided to use "Dat Shower". Come on, what's wrong with you? This is gold.

The prize for the most original and erudite Dis shower based joke goes to @the_unutterable on Twitter who said  "Dis is the city in Divine Comedy that contains the lower circles of hell so I'd stay out of that shower."  That puts all of you who tweeted the "dat shower" joke at me (even after I'd already done it myself) to shame. And it puts me to shame too, I suppose. It was a day where Hell was a theme, though luckily only as subject matter on stage. The non-disabled shower and toilet (yes, that's what dis stood for - I'd say it was pretty lazy to abbreviate it personally) had a big star on the door saying "Phill Jupitus", which I suppose was meant as some kind of tribute to the cuddly funny man, but I am not sure that having your star on a lavatory is totally complimentary. But it's better than not having a star anywhere I suppose. It did make me feel like that that particular door led to Phill's dressing room and that if I went in there I'd find him naked in the shower or sitting on the toilet. But luckily (or unluckily depending on your perspective) he wasn't in there. Though there was a slightly inefficient toilet that when you flushed it shot water (and whatever else might be in the bowl) on to the floor. You can't have everything.

Only 17 more chances to see the show and quite a few of them are sold out or close, so book now, especially if you want to see the DVD record in London in May. All the details are here. Still some tickets for Cardiff on Sunday. But Leeds, Salford, Chorley and Glasgow are all sold out (check with venues for returns) and Shrewsbury and Newcastle don't have many tickets left. Only playing the towns I do well in is doing wonders for my self-esteem. Make yourself feel popular by only hanging around with the people who like you, that's my new philosophy.



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My new stand up show, Lord of the Dance Settee will be touring from October 2014 to May 2015 All details here.
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