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My daughter is only 40 days old, but today she took her first step on the ladder to the showbiz success that she MUST achieve to avenge her father, when she appeared on stage in front of 300 people in Norwich. I provided support, both in terms of warming up the crowd for the first 90 minutes, and also because I was holding her. But she went down the best on the night, even though she slept through most of it. No nerves at all on her part. She’s a natural.
As charming as this impromptu double act was I don’t think we’ll make this a regular occurrence just yet, but if Phoebe foolishly chooses a career in show business then she can claim that she began at under 6 weeks of age. In 2115 she might be telling the world that she has been on stage for a hundred years.
Catie and Phoebe had come up to see me (and if they are honest to meet up with their friends who live locally). It was terrific to see them in the flesh, though Phoebe seemed non-plussed. The hotel had provided us with a cot, but unfortunately it filled the entire available floor space of our small room, so we got rid of it and Phoebe slept in her pram. And I didn’t mind getting up at 4am to change her nappy and feed her.
We’d been out for dinner with our friends who’d then come to the show. Catie and the baby stayed in my dressing room, which annoyingly for them no longer had a sofa in it because I was using it on stage. After the show someone asked if that had really been my baby on stage, which surprised me. I mean it’s possible that I might employ a young actor to play the part, but it would probably be easier overall for me to have brought on my own baby rather than steal one from the hospital. I think they thought that this was always the denouement to the show, rather than a one-off due to happenstance, but seemed perturbed that I would be keeping my baby from its bed. I don’t know if she had children, but babies don’t really care too much where they sleep at this stage and don’t really obey the clock in any case. And showbiz babies, born in a trunk, have always had to follow their parents up and down the country.
The gig had been a cracker. Giles the Cannibal and given me some super specific local facts, as he is a Norwich resident and my comments about Marigold who stood on the roundabout by Halfords directing the traffic and the burning down of the library in the 1990s (“three books were completely destroyed†I joked) surprised and delighted the crowd. In the past I have played this theatre for three nights (though I don’t think I ever sold them all out) so in a way selling out one night is not as spectacular as it might seem. I pretended that I was aggrieved not to be playing the Theatre Royal, but in reality I have played there before and I don’t think it’s as good a comedy venue as the Playhouse. Norwich has always been a special place on my tours, ever since the old days when Stew and me would try out a new tour show at the Arts Centre, so it was cool to share my new family member with the people of this town. I got given a couple of cards and even a Mothercare voucher by audience members afterwards. There really is no need for this kind of thing, but I appreciate the thought and that people are pleased for my good fortune in later life.
Tomorrow Giles heads for Australia and my family head back to London and I take on a slightly tricky solo trip to Birmingham (still some tickets left at the Glee) and then home again. It’s been a tough, but highly enjoyable couple of weeks. Every six months I get to a point where I feel I have finally got it with stand up and now I am great at it, but sure enough six months later I will discover I was wrong and that now I understand how to do it. This run of gigs has been another step up this never ending ladder of improvement. The good thing about being slightly out in the cold and working on my own is that it’s given me plenty of time to get adept at what I am doing. My foolish decision to give up stand up between 1992 and 2004 set me back a bit, but hopefully I will be granted an extra 12 years at the end of my life to make up for lost time.
