We are only a month away from Jesus' birthday, which is a time of great celebration and joy and peace to all men and comedians trying to flog DVDs. You know your gran thinks you like comedy and so will buy you a Peter Kay or Mrs Brown's Boys DVD unless you put her straight, so make sure you tell her you're one of the cool kids and so will need a DVD/book/video download/tour ticket from the obscure, underground, hasbeen comic Richard Herring.
Or if you have a friend who thinks Stewart Lee is the greatest comedian ever and you pity them for enjoying someone so mainstream and commercial, why not surprise them with some properly obscure comedy from me - if you really want to make them reconsider their attitude to experimental comedy you could always download all the Me1 Vs Me2 snooker frames and put them on a disc for them to enjoy.
Here are some fabulous Richard Herring gift ideas. And remember we're doing all this for Jesus and love and peace. Also remember it's Jesus' birthday and people often forget to get gifts for him, so why not buy him something of mine as well (Christ on a Bike might be an ideal gift) and then stick it in the font at your local church. It will get to him via angel delivery service (it's just like the owls in Harry Potter). He'll be well made up and probably let you into Heaven, even if you're an audiophile.
Anyway here's what's on offer.
If you're buying tickets to a show or a download, then it might feel like you don't have an actual physical gift to give. Maybe you're buying a DVD but would like to make it a bit more special. So like a charitable Santa I am going to provide a service that will make everything wonderful for you this Christmas.
If you make a donation of at least £5 to http://www.justgiving.com/wereallgoingtodie
I will send you a signed programme from any show of your choice (apart from menage a un, as I've run out of those). Make a donation of £15 or more and I will send you signed copies of all the programmes (apart from menage a un) and also signed leaflets for nearly every show (not Hercules Terrace). If you donate £20 or more I will send you all the programmes and leaflets and a signed copy of the "10" DVD which has my favourite routines from my last 9 tour shows + some extras (it's about two and a half hours of comedy). All this money will be going to SCOPE so you can feel doubly good about your gift. Just email me your address, which programme you would like (if you're only paying for one) and the name of the person you want the stuff dedicated to. My email address is email@example.com.
BTW this includes the programme to "We're All Going To Die!" which would be a nice additional gift if you're buying tour tickets. Obviously try to do this sooner rather than later if you want to get the stuff by Christmas.
It's THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!
The tour continues in 2014
The confirmed dates are here - http://www.richardherring.com/wagtd/tour
I will also be at the Unity Theatre in Liverpool on 20th February, in Aberdeen on 31st March and the Bloomsbury Theatre in London on 22nd and 23rd May (The DVD will be recorded on the 23rd). Hopefully the tickets for these will be on sale before Christmas. I will add them to the list as soon as they are all confirmed.
Check out http://www.richardherring.com/wagtd/
for reviews and other info on the show. And as I am mainly playing the towns in which I do pretty well it is worth booking ahead for these shows.
Tickets to this are THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
MEANING OF LIFE
My slightly insane and over-ambitious project to record my own 6 part internet TV show over the course of 7 months is up and running. Thanks to all those of you who came to the November recording. We are working on getting this edited now. It will be up at some point early in 2014 (hopefully) as a free audio and video. There will be ways to contribute financially if you want to keep this expensive project running, but I'd rather people saw it so that's why it's going to be free.
One way to help fund it is to come along and see the show being recorded. The next one is on January 26th and will be about the Paranormal. My guest expert will be Richard Wiseman. It's at the Leicester Square Theatre and it only costs £10 a ticket. Details are here - http://leicestersquaretheatre.ticketsolve.com/shows/873495678/
Tickets to this are THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
The whole fourth season of RHLSTP is now available to download from Go Faster Stripe. Episodes are £3.50 each or you can get all eight shows for just £15. The guests were Stephen Merchant, Simon Pegg, Dara O Briain, Ross Noble, Miles Jupp, Miranda Hart, Rufus Hound and Shappi Khorsandi. Even buying just one episode will really help us keep the project going. And you can easily gift an episode or the whole series to a friend, by simply giving them the necessary log-in code. Purchase the podcasts here - http://www.gofasterstripe.com/cgi-bin/website.cgi?page=podcasts
As always they are also up as free audio at the British Comedy Guide - http://www.comedy.co.uk/podcasts/richard_herring_lst_podcast/
or on iTunes - https://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/richard-herrings-leicester/id520831548
If you can't pay I would really appreciate it if you could spread the word about the show to anyone that you think might enjoy it.
You can buy tickets to the next series (no guests comfirmed, but some very tasty possibilities) here - http://leicestersquaretheatre.ticketsolve.com/shows/873492663/
The paid downloads and tickets are THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
T-SHIRTS and HOODIES
There are some exclusive RHLSTP, RHEFP and Me1VsMe2 themed T-shirts and other stuff available at http://richardherring.cottoncart.com/
We're going to be putting up new designs all the time. All the cool kids are wearing these. About 10 cool kids.
They are THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
DVDS and other PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFTS
My latest DVDS Talking C*ck and 10 are available from the Welsh misfits at http://www.gofasterstripe.com/
You can also get all my previous shows on DVD there (apart from Hitler Moustache as that is sold out at the moment and the firm that printed them isn't making any more) - a few of them are available to download. There are also some podcast CDs and a couple of books available. And you can buy both series of Fist of Fun either in seperate presentation packs with loads of extras or together as a just the shows (and commentaries) package.
All of these things are THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT.
TALKING C*CK on KINDLE
I'd much rather you bough the Talking C*ck book on paper from gofasterstripe, but you can also get in on the kindle (and other ebook devices).
I make no money from that so it's NOT THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT
If you have Netflix then my 2008 show, "The Headmaster's Son" is now available to view. Please do so, because if it proves popular then there's a chance that more of my stuff might get on there. You don't even have to watch it. Just let it play on your TV while you're out doing something else.
It's the PERFECT CHRISTMAS DAY FAMILY VIEWING (apart from the bit where I talk aboue w*nking off Pa*dos, but just talk loudly during that bit and your gran will never know the difference).
My daily blog recently celebrated 4000 consecutive entries without missing a day. And November 25th is its 11th birthday. You can read it for free here - http://www.richardherring.com/warmingup/
or listen to me reading it out for free on soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/herring1967
or iTunes. Or for a small monthly fee have it delivered to your kindle - http://www.amazon.co.uk/Richard-Herring-Warming-Up/dp/B004SRFTJ8/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1385385816&sr=8-1&keywords=warming+up
There are also kindle versions of the first few months of the blog (with extra content)
Bye Bye Balham - http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bye-Balham-Warming-Up-ebook/dp/B006U5V8MI/ref=pd_cp_kinc_1
The Box Lady and Other Pesticles - http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Lady-Other-Pesticles-Warming-ebook/dp/B00AIR9M4K/ref=pd_sim_kinc_1
They are ADEQUATE CHRISTMAS GIFTS
At last there is a new frame of Me1 Vs Me2 Snooker up at the British Comedy Guide - http://www.comedy.co.uk/podcasts/richard_herring_snooker/
and iTunes - https://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/me1-vs-me2-snooker-richard/id485710409
I know you're pleased.
I will also be doing some new episodes of the We're All Going To Die podcast in the New Year. Listen to the first one here - http://www.comedy.co.uk/podcasts/richard_herring_were_all_going_to_die/
These are free, but you could give people the links or burn them on to CD to make a WEIRD CHRISTMAS GIFT.
You can read all my Metro columns here - http://metro.co.uk/author/richard-herring-ukmetro/
You can print them up and make them into a book and give them to someone.
It would be a DISAPPOINTING CHRISTMAS GIFT.
Thanks so much for all your support throughout 2013. I hope I can keep delivering good and weird and rubbish comedy in 2014 and that you'll be there to ingest some of it through your ears and eyes. Have a terrific Christmas or other religious festival or non-religious festival. Or December.
Don't forget to buy something for Jesus. Also Satan who often gets overlooked at this time of year too.
I love you all equally (I don't love any of you)
Richard K Herring