I was on my way to Kew to do a gig when I got a call from the promoter saying that they hadn't sold many tickets and that they were going to pull the show. It was a shame, but these sunny evenings do put the dampeners on comedy nights. Wait til the World Cup starts as well. You get an audience of only vampires who hate sport (and most vampires love sport).
I had just arrived in Hammersmith and rather than turn round and go home I thought I'd head down to the river and do what all the people who weren't coming to the show were doing have a nice cold beer in the evening warmth.
I enjoyed it. I got a pint of Budvar and stood by the river, looking over at Hammersmith Bridge, remembering
my the one moment of pure triumph in my life. I was slightly self-conscious about drinking alone, but sometimes it's good to spend a little time with yourself, just thinking and watching the world. A crew of thick legged female rowers brought their boat ashore nearby. A slightly distraught young woman alone in a party frock kept checking her mobile (her friend turned up eventually). I considered regularly checking mine, just to make anyone who was interested in me think that I was waiting for a late friend. I decided not to bother.
I then walked down to another pub for a second pint and sat in a secluded spot up a little staircase in the tiny beer garden. I looked at the planes flying in the sky and thought about flying away myself next week. Then I looked at the moon and considered the fact that although it appears still, it is like the earth a gigantic sphere of rock spinning through the infinitite reaches of space. I was well into my second pint by now remember and usually if you are drinking alone you are hiding indoors in shame and unable to contemplate the cosmos. As I looked at the overarching dome of the sky and began to consider my own insignificance in the grand scheme of things I decided it was probably time to go home. One drink can be a good thing, but more drink always spoils things. I stopped in time to say that I had enjoyed the balmy evening, but not quickly enough to avoid having glanced into the abyss. If only I had got to Kew I would have had the false vindication of making 15 strangers laugh, but instead I looked inside myself and saw that I am essentially pointless. No more so than anyone else. Well, a bit more than some people.
It was a good evening.
