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Into hospital this morning for my 6 month check up with my oncologist, Dr Sharma (from off the Can I Have My Ball Back? Audiobook). It is very reassuring to have the regular contact and scans and blood tests. If all goes well this will continue for another two and a half years and then I will be declared immortal and impervious to cancer (as is my understanding).
As you may know if you've been taking an unnatural interest in my remaining nut, it has attempted to grow its own bollock and has a sizeable (though harmless) cyst on it. This was obviously a bit of a sick making shock when I discovered it during a self-exam last year, but they are keeping an eye on it and the surprise news today (to me and my oncologist it seemed) was that after growing bigger last year, it has shrunk by a centimetre). Dr Sharma seemed confused by this but I think it's got to be less of a problem if they cyst is smaller. Unless my cyst is fading away because it has cancer and then spreads that cancer to me.
I don't think that can happen.
I have felt worse this year than I did the year I had cancer though. The virus I've had for over two months has more or less gone, but there's another one working its way through the family so am steeling myself for more. The bugs you get from your kids are thus worse than cancer and I am the proof of that. QED.
I prepped for Twitch of Fun (though I don't know why because then a load of stuff I could never have predicted happens - see Henry Hippo's catchphrase/voice/name which all came out of nowhere (as did he - I did some filming with the kids before the show and one of them left him on the desk). I tweeted that I'd be covering the big news stories and to illustrate that attached a picture of a woman who'd bought a Kitkat that was all chocolate and no wafer and somehow got in the papers for that. This prompted a slew of responses from people who'd got all chocolate/no biscuit biscuits over the years, all seemingly remembered still with fondness and wonder. I knew this was the case as we'd once had a pack of Trios in our family shop that had had no biscuit, just chocolate and toffee (thus a Duo) and it was the best week of my life (I think it might actually have happened twice and the second time was also the best week of my life). But others had had some amazing luck, including one person who said their friend had had a cornetto where the cornet, instead of having that bit of chocolate at the bottom was FULL of chocolate and another who had fulfilled my wildest dream ( my dreams are not that wild) and had a pack of dry roast peanuts that was no peanuts, all dust. Though I suspect both of those were liars.
It made me think that the biscuit companies should release special edition no-biscuit biscuits, though I think perhaps the fun comes from the lottery and the surprise. There are some experiences that money can't buy (or at least that have to come through chance - I am not suggesting you shoplift Trios). It feels like a win when it happens by chance.
This formed a good chunk of a very tired, but enjoyable Twitch of Fun with no Victorian Ghost Child, so those of you who say I need her to be funny, can eff off. Though the experience is not as much fun as a Kit Kat without a wafer.
