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The summer holidays have flown by with indecent haste. Phoebe is back at school next Thursday (but for how long? Am I right?) We're packing in the summer holiday treats into this final week. Today we risked getting soaked to revisit our old favourite Willows Farm/Peter Rabbit World. I threw caution to the wind and became got a family annual membership (it's pretty expensive, but still cheaper than I thought when I checked last time) and I think that was a good move. Knowing it's all paid for meant I didn't feel obliged to stay all day, in spite of gathering storm clouds - we can pop down for a couple of hours any time (and believe me, we will be doing this as I am determined to get more than my money's worth). A lot of it is still closed of course, but there was enough going on to keep us all entertained. Ernie rocked out to the live shows (though was still desolate that he didn't get to hug Mr Tod which is all he's wanted to do all summer- I worry this will turn into a weird evil fox peccadillo, but it's probably too late to save him now) and Phoebe went on the trampolines. It was almost like a normal day out.
We're off to see dinosaurs tomorrow and going to Legoland on Monday. The kids showed me a video advert for it today. It looks fun. I suspect the reality will be more queuey and frustrating, but what is parenthood about if not arguing in a world made of tiny plastic bricks. Doubtless you will get a report next week.
We were going to go to Pizza Express for lunch. My wife wondered if we should book. I told her there was no way in a million years that there wouldn't be tables left at this ailing franchise. Turns out we should have booked, so we had some sad paninis in Caffe Nero instead and I reflected on the dangers of using sitcom motifs, which are, by their very nature, designed to explode in your face. I then did a supermarket sweep dash round Waitrose whilst the family waited in the car. They decided to all sit in the boot for a bit of fun (with the back seats down there's plenty of room in the people carrier). Children are insane.
There was a slight queue to get in for the first time in ages (I include these details for future supermarket historians studying the affect of the pandemic on supermarkets), but aside from that things ran pretty smoothly. Trying to work out the optimum time to start hoarding stuff for the double cluster fuck of the second Covid wave and Brexit. Will be writing about that for the opposing group of supermarket historians who are studying the affect of Brexit on supermarkets. I don't know much about the future, but I do know that supermarket historians are going to make up a significant proportion of academia and they will be constantly fighting over whether Brexit or Covid was responsible for the collapse of the food chain. Weirdly no one thinks it's a combo of both. The future will continue to divide all issues as black and white. It is the only legacy of our generation. Apart from the economic devastation and population decrease and environmental disaster. You're welcome guys. Hope this valuable supermarket info makes up for it.
Kids sometimes sat in the boots of cars for fun too. My wife was with them too by the way. I didn't just leave my kids in the boot of the car for half an hour like a monster. And anyone who says I did is lying.
The stone clearing Kickstarter ended on an incredible £22,850 which gives us a great boost in terms of paying for the RHLSTPs we filmed late last year and earlier this year and making the series of Everything Happens For No Reason. Thanks to the 540 legends who are now members of the stone clearer's guild. Membership will not be open again for 100 years. And the only way anyone else will get these rewards now is at inflated prices on eBay. You suckers.
And there's a little taster pic of the Snooker kickstarter above which will be starting soon. All the profits will go to charity for this one (want to give the money to struggling comedy clubs to help keep them going). Also it's the most fucking awesome kickstarter we've done, so I hope we can far surpass the target. I will let you know when it's up.
No Relativity this week, so apologise for the lack of product for you to enjoy. Have to up my output.
