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I had to go to the chemist to pick up my blood pressure pills. If you're lucky there will be a parking space nearby - Hitchin has quite a few with a 20 minute or one hour limit near to the shops, but you aren't guaranteed to get one.
Today there wasn't a space, but I knew this transaction would take two minutes tops, so I parked on double yellow lines, slightly blocking access to a gated car park for the flats next door. They could still get in and out if they had to.
And old Hitchin man was sat on the wall opposite, presumably having nothing better to do with his time. He looked me in the eye and shook his head theatrically whilst pulling a disapproving face.
He was right that I was technically in the wrong and maybe if I'd parked there for an hour he'd have a point. Had I been in a more irritable mood I might have reacted to his judgement more forcefully. But life is good at the moment and I don't have to get into fights with weak old men to create fodder for my blog. Not anymore. I did consider shouting out "Sorry mate, it's an emergency. I have to get medicine for my seriously ill child." Or "Don't judge me, mate. I'm not the one sitting on a fucking wall at 10.30 in the morning." I am absolutely certain that back in the day, when this man had a car, he would occasionally park on a double yellow line if thought he could get away with it. Let he who is without sin cast the first glance.
As it turned out the till at the chemist was playing up and though my pills were in front of me in under a minute, the clock kept ticking as they tried to get the connection working.
This might cost me a lot more than the tenner that I was paying for my pills. That old fella could be letting the air out of my tyres as I mainly patiently waited.
It was still probably only a three minute wait, not enough time for a traffic warden to appear. It had been enough time for the old geezer to cross the road so he could stand nearer my car and look at it disapprovingly. Maybe he was there to help - if anyone was blocked by me he could tell them where I was. Still it was none of his fucking business. Though I have seen some areas in Hertfordshire are considering allowing civilians to report illegally parked vehicles. This fella would be in his fucking element if they did that and would definitely have reported me to the North Herts Stasi.
It would be much too efficient a system though. Traffic wardens and parking fines rely on people like me taking a chance and parking illegally. If I knew any old codger in the vicinity could issue me a fine, then I definitely wouldn't have illegally parked. And if no one illegally parks then no revenue comes in. It's hawks and doves. If you system is too efficient it wipes out the crime and thus the money that comes from the punishment.
Though it you just rely on busybody old people who will do your work for free then maybe that doesn't matter.
I felt like shouting "No harm done. My child might survive now," at the old man. But I have to remember that old men (and women) are not a different species). One day, a long way into the future, I will be an old man and maybe I will have nothing better to do than to sit on a wall shaking my head. It's sort of what I do on a grander scale for my job, anyway.
I bet you can't wait to read the blogs I am writing then though.
