I had a much happier day today, managing to make some good progress on the second draft of Gorgeous and still finding time to speculate on Twitter on the idiocy of having Shane Ritchie host a new version of Jim'll Fix It. It has to be someone called Jim or Jimmy or James. Even Jim'll or at a stretch Jamall. But not Shane'll Fix It or even Ritch'll Fix It (and if they're going that way - cough cough). There must be some suitable Jims out there. Jimmy Carter was my favourite, though others liked the idea of Krankie (suitably scary for the kids) or Cricket. And other suggested Carr, who would be amazing for so many reasons, though only if he chose to break all the dreams of the aspirant Fixees as being unrealistic. I wondered about having a special where It from the kids show "Five Children and It" could attempt to resurrect and mend the deceased Savile, in a show called "It'll Fix Jim". Two of the creepiest characters on children's TV would be united. But if It wouldn't do it, then maybe they could get Cousin It from the Addam's Family. Or just a woman who could rub her breasts on the Savile cadaver in a show called "Tits'll Fix Jim'll". If you've seen the clip of Savile with the 14 year old Coleen Nolan on Top of the Pops then you should be aware that "Tits'll Fixate Jim" would be another possible show. But only if one of the Its or the tits have fixed him.
Twitter was fun again today anyway. Even when my Objective show about wheelchairs had aired (I had anticipated moronic Gervais fans returning to tell me what a hypocrite I was, but all was fine and there was no splashback). I haven't listened to the show yet, but from the reaction I got I think it has to be the most successful Objective, if not radio show, that I have ever done. It's up on iPlayer if you missed it
and will be the BBC podcast of the week (out next Monday I think) and it is also my understanding that various internet sites have mp3 downloads, though of course I would never direct them to you for fear of upsetting my bosses Ian B, Ian B (confusingly) and Ian C and well as the 4th Ian Radio brother. As you'll know if you read the blog these shows were tough to write, and blogging about this one led to the whole Twitter meltdown of last month, so it's gratifying that most people liked it. Though apologies to the three people who complained to the BBC about my mispronunciation and mockery of the name Chiara. You can never guess what will offend people.
I'd been a bit worried about attendance at my late night Soho Theatre shows, but tonight was almost full in the end (still some tickets for Wednesday and Thursday, but Friday and Saturday sold out - but check back later for returns and standing tickets). Book here
. The show went well, so with writing, radio and live work all coming together it felt like a happy day. But the late night meant I got home full of adrenaline and with my mind buzzing with ideas for the script and I couldn't sleep. Twitter again provided a quantum of solace and I had fun bantering and being rude and pretending to hate the sleeping people of Britain and the night shift workers of Australia. Maybe the shark has not been jumped yet. Maybe I was just in better spirits.
If you've been listening to the audio versions of this blog via iTunes or Soundcloud, you'll notice I've had some struggles with the pronunciation of the word opprobrium in the last couple of days. Thanks to those who have pointed out it's opprobrium. That will work better in the audio version to be honest. The next problem I have is that I can never quite remember if opprobrium means approval or disapproval and have to look it up to check. How do I get out of that one? Plus the fact that even though I've been told I'm not sure I am going to remember how to pronounce it. Maybe I should just use the word disapproval. Or is it approval? And is there a word disopprobrium or did I imagine it?