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Monday 14th September 2009

On 15th-19th December I am appearing in Robin Ince's Nine Lessons and Carols for Godless People. I did one of the shows last year, but will be appearing in all of them this time round which I was very excited about. Robin might actually be magic or in league with the devil or something because he always seems to put together the most amazing and eclectic line-ups. Last year it was exciting to be in the same room as Richard Dawkins (who has lived the dream and had sex with one of Dr Who's assistants - and it wasn't Adric, who everyone has done), but this year, the news came through today Alan Moore will be appearing on the 16th and as if that wasn't incredible enough Johnny Ball will be doing the shows on the 15th, 16th and 17th. I was genuinely and unironically gleeful to think that I will be sharing the stage with Mr Ball, who, if you are of my generation was one of the mainstays of children's television. His shows were truly incredible, educational, but fun and his unaffected exuberance was infectious and exhilarating and more importantly he was funny. I remember once he was hobbling around with his back bent saying that he had a gold bar down the back of his jumper. Then he laughed at the idea saying that if that was true his back would be broken by the weight. But then he revealed that the bar was indeed genuine. He was fucking around with our tiny minds, telling us lies, being post-modern before anyone outside of the world of philosophy knew what that was. I am still to this day baffled and confused by that piece of TV. I guess that having a gold bar down your jumper doesn't break your back, but I have never forgotten the bit (though perhaps I am not remembering it exactly right).
I can only begin to imagine the reception he is going to get when he walks on to that stage. He is a man who is, I would think, universally loved by everyone who remembers him, like a zany uncle figure and I think the roof is going to come off the place. How wonderful it must be to be held in such affection. I can't wait to meet him, but imagine I will clam up and be overwhelmed when it happens. I know that tickets are selling fast for these nights and will sell out well in advance so do book now if you want to come.
And while I'm plugging let me also remind you that the Lyric Hammersmith Comedy Nights are starting again next Sunday with the extraordinarily strong bill of Al Murray, Alistair McGowan, Wilson Dixon and myself. I have been a bit surprised by how slowly tickets have been selling, though there hasn't been much publicity. It's been picking up a bit this week and hopefully it should sell out. Tickets start at just ten pounds (for upper circle seats - and if the lower seats don't sell out then I suspect you'll be moved down a tier anyway if you want to take a gamble) and the shows we've put on in the past have been amongst the best nights of comedy I have been involved in. So do come along if you're around. Maybe I should try and book Johnny Ball for one. And while you're there why not book ahead for the show on the 25th October, which features Stephen Merchant and Edinburgh Comedy Prize winner and rib cracker Tim Key. These really are extraordinary bills. Not Robin Ince extraordinary, but as close as a non-Satan sponsored human being can get to that.

I continue to be gobsmacked by technology, having finally downloaded the free Sky+ application to my iPhone. I have no clue how this can possibly work, but it it allows you to record programmes on your Sky+ box via your phone, WHEREVER YOU ARE. I had tried it out from the lounge in my TV room last night, which is less impressive as the remote control was right beside me, but today I was at the gym and tried it out and managed to record "Deal or No Deal" from my phone. What's that all about? How amazing is the future? Much better than I ever imagined when I was young.
And if you want to pay money on an application then for the next 2 days you can still give me 10p by buying appygolucky's Profanity application. It's well worth getting, but only for the next few hours whilst our sponsorship deal still holds good. After that appygolucky can fuck off the dumb fat-handed moops.
And my goodness I wish I had seen this Edinburgh show. It's not a million miles from my Mars Bar idea, which I am hoping to do for a few days at least at next year's Free Fringe, but it is what the Fringe should be all about. Genius.

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