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Thursday 8th April 2021

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My daughter did another painting in her series, Dad Falling Into Lava and took great pains to describe to me how the yellow blob disappearing into a sea of red was me with all my hair burned off and my eyes popped and my hands and feet basically just stumps. It’s a much more sophisticated work than her earlier attempts. This isn’t really a charming story for the blog, just a clue for the police about who might be responsible if I am ever found burned up in some lava. Of course the beauty of using lava as a murder weapon is that the body will never be found. My daughter is a criminal genius. She can afford to taunt me.
She’s also started referring to me as her mum’s “sidekick”. It’s like having my own internet troll living in my house.

Am feeling normal (whatever that means) and even considered going for a run today, but contented myself with walking up to the Post Office to post off this month’s monthly badger prize. Hopefully we will be getting the dog back at the weekend, which means more walks and a return of stone clearing (I can’t imagine how strewn with stones the field will be after all this time of neglect). The Winter snooker tourney should recommence on Monday. Thank you for your patience.

Prepping for Twitch of Fun (which is just looking for stories that I think might interest the various puppets - I come up with minimal ideas of what might actually happen during this time. It does take up most of my day, but I am getting better at just finding a story and taking a punt that it might work. And to be honest the show seems to be at its best when Ally (or whoever) takes me off in a direction I am not expecting. I didn’t think a story about cavemen creating art due to being deprived of oxygen would lead to Ally attempting a mash-up between Love is Like Oxygen by The Sweet and Love is Like a Butterfly from the TV show Butterflies. It was also a show which questioned science, mathematics and whether reality is what we perceive it to be. We’re covering some big themes. And most shows that attempt that don’t have a phallic root vegetable that attempts (and usually fails) to find double entendres in everything that’s being said. Which is what makes my show the best. Over 1100 people tuned in at some point, with around about 300 watching at any given time (though it went down a bit once Taskmaster started). I can’t work out if that’s terrible or amazing. It’s kind of both. I believe I can build it (even though there is no real evidence of that happening over the first 33 eps). In 20 years we could have 2000 people watching.
Nothing will stop me doing it though. Apart from having another bollock removed.
It will be up in the usual places on Friday.

Delighted to announce that I am doing some live RHLSTPs with an actual fucking audience (to be honest they might be fucking) at the Clapham Grand in May, June and July. It’s socially distanced so tickets are limited, but I’d love to see you there. And if you can’t get there you can buy tickets to watch online. I am aiming for some big guests, so book early.
Genuinely excited about getting in front of an actual audience again. There have been many good things about doing the show remotely (mainly that it could continue and provide our business with revenue during this difficult year), but I think the audience is what sets the podcast apart and draws the best out of the guests. Let’s get the post-Covid Roaring Twenties off to a brilliant start!
All the shows will of course be released as free (though possibly edited) podcasts for those of you who can’t or won’t pay.
Badgers will get advanced warning of the guests either by email or in the members’ area of rhlstp.co.uk. Become a badger here http://gofasterstripe.com/badges
This and more news in my latest newsletter 


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