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Wednesday 21st February 2024

Sometimes I feel like I haven't achieved as much as other people with this precious gift of life. I compare myself to other successful people and am found wanting. But today I realised how stupid I was being. I was comparing myself to the wrong successful people.
I think we can all agree that the Roman army was a pretty successful fighting force, but I could defeat every single unit that every existed with my hands tied behind my back.
Stephen Hawkings was a pretty smart fella, but he would be useless against me in a pub quiz.
Shakespeare was an OK playwright, but in a playwriting contest he'd be a non-starter compared to me.
I am like a million times sexier than Marilyn Monroe (except to those with niche taste and I can also cater to them eventually).
I had made the mistake of comparing myself to living successful people. But go up against dead successful people and you come out top (pretty much) every time. And with this new perspective I find myself in the top 5.5% of people (as 94.5% of people who have ever lived have stopped living). And a lot of the people who are alive are babies so that propels me even higher. I will kick the shit out of any baby who thinks they can beat me in a fight. Not that they need any help getting the shit out of them. I definitely wouldn't take them on in a shitting contest.
I feel good about myself again.

More chatting online, this time involving people other than just myself, with a fun interview with Kerry Godliman and Jen Brister for their podcast Memory Lane.  It involves choosing 5 or 6 photos from your life and talking about why they're significant. Not only was it fun to talk about them it was also fun to go through your photos to choose the best ones. Kerry and Jen are very funny and it was an easy chat that could have gone on all afternoon, except I then had to talk to move on to talk to Iain Lee for the 4 Extra comedy club. I'm not saying I like talking about myself, but I like talking about myself so good to be the subject of the chat, rather than the person asking the questions. Iain's a great interviewer and we had fun pretending that I had to come back three times to do the chat, which is being broadcast over three different nights. Imagine if I recorded two episodes of RHLSTP a night and then tried to pretend I only did one. It would be exactly as funny as this.

RHLSTP with the peerless Lee Mack is now up wherever you get your podcasts

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