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Thursday 14th March 2019


Date night. Or date afternoon and evening. We went to a 4pm showing of Captain Marvel. Wait, what, they made Captain Marvel a WOMAN??? I have no idea who Captain Marvel is, so can’t tell you whether she was ever a man, but she’s a woman in this. And I am furious. Not about the film, but about some deep personal issue that I am repressing very hard and which only comes out when I suspect someone might have been dicking around with kids’ films. Why should I care so much about kids’ films? Not because of some deep trauma in my childhood that I can only cope with by keeping everything the same. That’s for sure.
Sadly even though it was only the late afternoon, the dark cinema and the suspicion that I was watching a video game sent me drifting off to sleep. It’d had been a full on day as always and I couldn’t resist the chance to catch up on rest a bit. Which was a shame because the film, despite being a cartoon with people in it for kids, actually looked quite funny and smart when I did wake up. Not that I knew what was going on through most of it. There was a funny bit where an alien looked perturbed at how slow 1990s computer loading was. And my wife loved the film, because of all the female empowerment and women punching spaceships to death. But when will there be male empowerment?
We then drove quite a long way to go to a Thai restaurant, as my wife loves Thai and it’s much harder to find out here in the countryside - why did we ever move from London? Why didn’t we appreciate what we had at the time? Like the ability to sleep as much as we wanted and not during films.
Still the cinema was only £8 each, so take that London.
We’d been to the restaurant before and it was only when we got our starters that we remembered we hadn’t liked it that much last time. The food felt a bit processed and the lighting was super bright and we’ve been eating so much healthy home cooked food that having stuff packed with oil and whatnot made us feel a little bit queasy. It was lovely to be out and the company is all that matters (and at least my wife didn’t fall asleep at any point - that would be a real insult on a date), but we were home pretty early and in bed by 9. 
But sometimes it’s the fact you tried rather than the fact you won.

I had a rare satisfying chat on social media with someone who had taken objection to my campaign of last week.
He said, "raising awareness of testicular and prostate cancer male suicide is a good thing why be against it if u like mens day it doesn't mean u hate womens day why are u so easly offended by it”
I replied, "I support IMD and am going to use it to raise money for male suicide charity. My issue is the people who only care about it on IWD. And who don't know it exists. So am doing all I can to rectify those situations. Problem with that?”
Before adding, “The joke is all these people assuming there isn't a day and thinking they're clever to point it out, when there is a day and they shoudl learn to use google. IT's pretty simple.”
He replied, “Fair enough.”
Why can’t it always be this civilised?

The next batch of RHLSTP on tour dates have been announced. More will be added and as long as this works we will carry on doing gigs on the road. So please support us by buying tickets and spreading the word. They mostly seem to be selling quickly though, so don’t hang around. Ticket links at
Birmingham - SOLD OUT
Brighton (early show) Angela Barnes
Brighton (late show) Stephen Grant (SOLD OUT)
Kings Place, London
Kings Place, London
Warwick Arts Centre
Henley Festival - Barry Cryer
Brighton Theatre Royal
Leicester Haymarket
Bristol Old Vic
Richmond Theatre
Winchester Comedy Fest
Exeter Corn Exchange
Newcastle Stand x2
York Grand Opera House
Liverpool Playhouse (on sale in a week or so)
Cambridge Corn Exchange
Northampton Deco
Glasgow Theatre Royal
Sheffield City Hall
Hull City Hall

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